This weekend has been something of a turn around for me. It also happens to be the first time I've published a blog post since October - so quite like a phoenix, I'm rising from the ashes.
A few months ago in November, the day before my 26th birthday, my dad passed away. It was devastating and my whole world fell apart.
Since then I've been experiencing waves of grief and it has been as if my spirit has been in this tempest with only glimpses of reprieve. It has genuinely felt as if the storm would never pass. It still hasn't. Each day is a struggle.
Understandably what ever motivations, interests or passions that kept me going either diminished significantly or entirely evaporated. Any energy I could muster was used to get through days at work, conversations or simply trying to get dressed at times.
Most evenings and weekends have been spent majorly in the comfort and safety of my bed covers. There are few mirrors to remind you that you've looked better.
Eating, cooking and this blog were no longer priorities. If I cooked, it was usually only to keep up some strength and my main source was pasta. Part of me thought that I would never make a return to writing here, that it would get to a point where I saw no future or even any point. I tried to write and even planned posts for Veganuary which never saw the light of day. I outlined a blog series that I gave up on.
Yet don't get me wrong: this is not me displaying regret. My grief and recuperation needed to be embraced. I had to find my feet again, and no amount of newly purchased cookbooks or knives would expedite the process.
- Update: So Where Am I? -
But jjsvegankitchen is not gone, it's simply returning slowly from an abrupt but essential hiatus!
I revisited some of my new cookbook: Kaukasis, Deliciously Ella, among others. I tried not to focus on particular recipes but more on what I could do.
And then there I was in the supermarket looking at different possibilities. Cooking did not feel like it had to be such a laborious task, and maybe eventually I could be creative again.
I will be updating soon. I'm going to be more proactive and dedicate time to researching, cooking and writing. Even playing about with my new camera to up my photo game. I have a few topics about vegan life that I hope to have up in the next few weeks, book reviews alongside a series on foods from around the world -- veganised, of course!
I want this platform to grow and to share with those who want to read it. Stay tuned!
**All images used are 'Free From Wix'